We make our way to a quiet area of the centre and end up at LOLA’s café because it seems to be the only suitable place, quiet enough for our meeting but also because his eyes gaze at the lovely cakes on display. He orders a piece of carrot cake and turns to me to ask if I want anything, and adds “a few calories won’t hurt, would it?” I nod in agreement because if I was not interviewing, I would have probably ordered a piece myself.
Where do I start my interview? I ask myself, this is a man known to have masturbated on national TV, a man who was laid off from his teaching job for moonlighting as a stripper and adult film performer, a man who is known for his outspoken views on sex, sexual identity and sexual liberalism. From the beginning I suppose, so it was no surprise that he reveals to me that he likes to go to the gym as many times as possible, which is understandable for a man whose body is a necessary tool to work in his industry. “When I am not in London, I am either trying to learn a new language or spending time with my family and dogs”, he tells me. He recently just adopted a husky from a dog charity started by fellow 2012 Big Brother housemate, Victoria Eisermann.
Our conversation is going pretty well, he is coming across as a very humble and articulate man, an aura pretty much different from his outspoken and opinionated self that is often documented and talked about. He is calm, not aggressive, easy to speak to and not difficult. I ask him how he deals with people’s opinion of him, he says, “People find it difficult to talk about certain things all the time, but it is those things that I like to talk about. When people say nasty things to me, I respond their stupidity back to them.”
In June 2012, Benedict entered the Big Brother house as part of series 13, and immediately made quite an impression on viewers and his fellow contestants, partly because of his profession and because of his controversial views on sex and the royal family. He describes his experience on show as a pretty boring and difficult one, as he found himself in a house with people he had not met before. He tells me, “I felt more intelligent because of the types of characters in the house. Apart from Victoria and me, probably Luke A, it was pretty much a younger crowd in the house.” He seems to think that if there were more people with more life experiences, it could have been a more enjoyable experience for him.
Benedict played a major role in two highlights of the show, the first - being the culprit who added curry powder to Luke Scrases’ protein formula, and for the very candid conversation about masturbation that he had with Caroline Wharram. He recounts the latter by telling me, “People probably felt uncomfortable because they saw an edited version of what happened. What they didn’t see was before I mentioned my w--king in the bathroom to Caroline; I said to her ‘Caroline when you’re ready, I want to talk to you’, and then that is when she asked if it was about masturbation.”
However, he does not regret the experience or the exposure he got on the show, admitting, “I will do something like that again; I would not rule out another opportunity like that,” as he stands to help a woman struggling to collapse her baby’s push-chair.
Prior to his Big Brother fame, Benedict made headline news for being the teacher who also worked as a stripper and adult film star, which led to him losing his teaching job. He remembers the events by telling me “I was driving into school on the day and I was told that someone else will be taking my classes for me, it was at that point I knew they knew.” He adds, “There were rumours going around for about two weeks. Some students had seen me in a trailer, so I was suspended first before being laid off.”
Contrary to general belief, Benedict has been in the adult film industry for close to a decade, even before he became a teacher. It is an industry that he is proud to be a part of and has no problem talking about. He is frustrated that as a society we are not free to talk about sex and how we feel the need to have a sexual identity simply because of who we are having relations with. “People will not give honest responses about certain things like sex because they are not free or open to talk about it,” he states. But he also reveals, “I like having sex, we are sexual beings.”
With a close connection to the adult film industry, one would think that this has affected the opportunities to do certain things, but he tells me, “I have been interviewed by the BBC and ABC in the USA to talk about pornography, and Noel Clarke had no problems casting me in his movie The Knot, even though I had told him I had a reputation out there.” He did admit that it has affected his personal life, “I find it hard to be in a relationship and I might not be able to foster or adopt kids again because of the industry I work in.”
If the relationship thing doesn't work out for him, he is still hopeful that he will succeed in his activism for social issues. “I want to make my own social change. I want to challenge those parts of society that need to be challenged,” he says with a determined tone in his voice, as he picks up the last piece of carrot cake left on his plate and I watch it disappear into his mouth.
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